By MONTE DUTTON

It’s impressive that everyone in the state knows how to pronounce my hometown’s name.

Clinnun.

Area broadcasters who call the university in Columbia “South Cuh-lina” know how to pronounce Clinton, and Clinton is hardly alone in being mispronounced.

Many broadcasters think Laurens is Lorens. People who live in Westminster say it Westminister. Residents of the Low Country think the newspaper in Clumbya is the Steht Peppuh. In college, for a year I roomed with a fellow from Flahnce.

In general, southerners say long words short – Louavull, N’Awlins – and short words long. Dayuhm. Gah-ah-leee. Not just Goddamighty but Good Goddamighty. If a Southerner uses the Lord’s name in vain, he makes sure He’s good.

Clintonians just give their town its proper tempo.

I’ll get used to everything about the NFL’s new kickoff rule except for the name.

The Dynamic Kickoff.

Please.

For the second year in a row, Clinton High had its first scrimmage rained out.

The Red Devils’ tussle against Belton-Honea Path and Byrnes, originally scheduled for Wilder Stadium, was moved to BHP on Thursday morning and then canceled at about 4 that afternoon.

Given the rain, it was hardly a surprise.

The odds are strong that Laurens’ scrimmage at Union County, moved from Thursday to Friday, will go off, though a night late.

The Raiders and the Yellow Jackets are to play at about 9 as the latter half of the McDonald’s Football Jamboree.

Laurens Academy is scheduled to scrimmage Cathedral Academy of North Charleston on Friday evening at Wardlaw Academy in Johnston.

Big South women’s soccer coaches chose the two-year reigning champion, Radford, as this year’s favorite, too.

PC was picked seventh in the nine-team conference.

The Highlanders, under the direction of 29-year head coach Ben Sohrabi, collected six of the nine first-place votes and 74 total points.

USC Upstate was voted second with 72 points, followed by High Point (69), Charleston Southern (47), Longwood  (43), UNC Asheville (37), Presbyterian(31), Winthrop (19) and Gardner-Webb (13).

No PC player made preseason all-conference.

BIG SOUTH PRESEASON ALL-CONFERENCE

F:  Dara Russo, USC Upstate (Preseason Offensive Player of the Year)

F:  Eileen Albers, Radford

F:  Peyton Curney, Longwood

F:  Tessa Carlin, High Point

MF:  Lilly Short, Radford (Preseason Midfielder of the Year)

MF:  Margret Edda Bjarnadottir, USC Upstate

MF:  Lindsey DeHaven, High Point

MF:  Paige Armstrong, USC Upstate (tie)

MF:  Alex Dinger, Longwood (tie)

MF:  Meg Roden, High Point (tie)

D:  Helena Willson, Radford (Preseason Defensive Player of the Year)

D:  Brooke Bonner, Longwood

D:  Alex DePerno, High Point

D:  Catarina Dantas, USC Upstate

GK:  Jenna Moran, Charleston Southern (Preseason Goalkeeper of the Year)

What was the Big South’s Public Relations Department is now Communications & Branding.

According to the release, the move “properly defines the staff roles and responsibilities of the Big South’s external and strategic communications efforts, media relations and media services, digital and social media offerings, storytelling, messaging and content creation, and broadcast initiatives.”

Sounds complicated, huh?

Director of Communications & Social Media Jordan Parry is now Assistant Commissioner-Communications & Branding, and Associate Commissioner-Public Relations Mark Simpson is now Senior Associate Commissioner-Communications & Branding.

Presbyterian College has an intrasquad scrimmage scheduled for Saturday at Bailey Memorial Stadium, beginning at 6.

Football season is straight ahead, and I could use your help.

My goal has always been to restore coverage for the kids. It’s as much fun as the Daytona 500, but it’s not as big and harder to make a living at. I rely on readers who like the coverage I provide to make contributions.

Advertising alone will not keep me going, but there’s room for a few more. Every ad is inset in every story.

You can support my site in several ways.

Support the advertisers. They are all fine people who appreciate my efforts, not to mention those of the kids, coaches, parents and fans.

Please donate whatever you consider appropriate via Venmo at DHK Sports. You may also reach me by mail at 11185 Highway 56 North, Clinton  29325.

If you choose, make a monthly donation via Patreon. The Laurens County site is here. The Furman site is here.

In the off chance you’d like to read my novels and other books, they’re available on Amazon and many prominent bookseller sites. You can read them on your phones and other devices for a modest cost. I make a bit more if you purchase the actual books, but what I mainly want is for folks to read them.

Sample my latest novel, The Latter Days. Download it for $2.99.

Photo galleries are posted on Instagram @furmanatt and @laurenscountysports.

Thanks for putting up with me.